where is the love?

for an average man, things or events that last six months and beyond they consider to love it. for women however, when it lasts for four months and more they have loved the thing.
i am a woman. one ordinary sunday after my routine jogging i was waiting for sun to rise. i counted the days and weeks until i reached months of counting since the first day i landed in where i am now. i realize it was almost four months since i am here. the question is, i am in love? just when i ponder, to whom? i cant seem to think of a name. or should i rephrase my question, why am i here?

it was an ultimate choice to choose to separate from comfort and live independently after college. it was the bravest decision i have ever made as far i could recall. what pushes me to this was at that time, i think, i wasnt anymore happy with where i was. i have always been reminding myself with the saying "stay if youre happy, leave when you are not". so i did.

now, i am stuck in this busy place where people seem to be different from where i left. am i really in love? upon sitting here in this concrete i know the only thing i love about this place is their sun rise which i believe is the second most beautiful thing next to a woman giving birth. but come to think of this, the sun rise everywhere. then, why am i here? -- C